Damn..

I'm paralyzed right now. Sara just posted this on my Facebook wall.

I don't know how to answer! But it hurts and makes me laugh at the same time. I really miss her too! Maybe we should start to talk again. That could be nice.

Forrest Gump

I love it when I come home, order pizza and turn on the TV. And it turns out that one of my favorite movies of all times is on the TV. Simply awesome!

Danish is a tough language

Just found this note on a slush-ice machine on the triangle station in Holstebro.. couldn't help myself :-P

don't sit down..

break a mirror, roll the dice
run with scissors through a chip pan fire fight
go into business with a grizzly bear
but just don’t sit down cause i’ve moved your chair

find a well known hardman and start a fightwear your shell suit on bonfire night fit them a circular hole with a peg that’s squarebut just don’t sit down cause i moved your chair

bite the lightning and tell me how it tastes
kung-fu fighting on your rollerskates
do the macarena in the devil’s lair
but just don’t sit down cause i’ve moved your chair

It's sad.. I know..

But I just couldn't help myself. So now I've ordered a ticket to the movies. I am going to the movies alone. I know it's sad. But I really don't care that much.

Hope you'll have a nice saturday evening too :)

okay..

Sorry, I haven't been writing the last few days. But I'm back now. And I feel good at the moment. And that's awesome.

I've got a new cell phone.

 and on sunday, I'm going to cottage (sommerhus) with my friend, Kåre.

It finally happened!

I was just sitting here on the couch, playing guitar. And then Sofie, the most awesome person in Holstebro, writes to me on facebook, and tells me that she needs a drummer and a bassist for her band. And since I can play bass, she told me that I was in.

So now I'm finally in a band. That's pretty awesome!

Restless

the clock is now 05:15, as I am writing this... And it's the 7th night in a row, where I almost haven't slept at all.

All week, I have been watching "Scrubs" all night, because I can't sleep, and because it makes me think of something else. And even though I know that in about 6 hours, Sebastian is going to wake me up in some stupid way, I still can't get myself to sleep. The wierdest thing is, though, that after a week with almost no sleep, I still don't feel tired.

Am I really that restless?

Is my head really that messed up?

Thank you for being there. Means a lot.

Fail

Do you know the feeling, that all the people around you always seems to have everything going exactly as they've planed? That they have everything figured out? They know what to do, and how to do it? That they have all the things you want, but simply can't have, because... I can't even finish that sentence.

As you've probably already guessed, this is exactly how I feel.

All my friends seems to have everything rolling for them. They have jobs, go to school, have girlfriends/boyfriends, a family who actually cares about them, a plan for their lifes, are good at what they do. You know.

And look at me. I'm a mess.
- I'm living alone in a shitty room, because my family threw me out.
- I dropped out of school, because I was too stupid to understand anything. And now I'm starting on a new    one, just to see if I eventually find something of interrest there.
- I will never be happy with what I do, because the one thing I really want is waaaaaaaay too unrealistic.
- I don't have a girlfriend, because the only girl I'm interrested in, will never go out with me because we're too much alike. And because she, just like me, is a big mess too. (Which just proves the point that we're too much alike)
- I don't have the ability to just go out and talk to people. Sometimes I even make excuses to avoid my friends.
- I'm lonely all the time, and when I'm around a lot people, I feel even more lonely.
- I spend all day, watching TV-shows on my computer or playing guitar.
- Sometimes I actually wish I was dead.
- Even though one of the only persons, who knows how I feel, and (I think) cares about me, tells me almost everyday, that I have to call a doctor, I never do it, because I always forget. And I really mean FORGET!
- I never feel like I'm fitting in anywhere.
- My friends is constantly reminding me of how unlucky I am. And that I never can do anything right.

I fail at life.


I am so sorry, that I (maybe) made you read all this. But this is the only way I can clear my head, without throwing all my problems directly at somebody's face.

And now, I'll try get some sleep.

words..

It's like I have a lot to tell.. But I just can't find the words.

So you'll just get another worth-and-meaningless, awfull, stupid, none-sence-making, time-wasting post, in my pathetic excuse of a blog.

have a nice day.

Congrats!

CONGRATULATIONS TO "THE VIKING WARRIOR", MIKKEL KESSLER, ON THE AWESOME VICTORY!

relaxation

Nonight is the last night I've have alone in a week. Going to a Galten tomorrow, and are staying there untill next sunday. I hope it's gonna be good. But I'm not sure, if I can go so long, without being alone. We'll see.

Yesterday I recieved a package with new strings, a soundcable and a capo for my guitar. Pretty awesome!
So now I've learned to play this:



 GO KESSLER!!

stress

The next week or so, is going to be very stressfull:

Tomorrow (Friday): My friend is picking me up, and we, and some of his other friends are going to his grandparent's summer house.

Saturday: My mothers birthday. And it means that I'll have to be around my idiot of a stepfather. The only person that I really hate. It's gonna be tough.

Sunday: Going to a party-tingy, with my best friend from Hammerum (Efterskolen. Der findes ikke noget ordenligt ord for det på engelsk, og jeg nægter at kalde det for en "bording school", for det er det ikke!). And that "party" last for several days. And normally I avoid parties, and especially big ones. But it's better than being alone. I hope.
I don't really know when I'm going to be home again. Hope I'll survive.
And if I don't, it won't make any difference anyways..

See ya.

Saved

Since sunday, I've been further down than ever before. I actually wanted to hurt myself. Badly. And I've never wanted that before. I was afraid of myself. Afraid that I might actually do it. I still am. But I'm feeling a little better now.

But yesterday, I was saved. My friend called, and asked me if I had any plans. I can't remember the last time I was so happy to here another persons voice. So he came to pick me up after work.

It was really nice to be with another person, so I could get my mind off all the dark thoughts that had been running through my head lately. Nice to be with friends.
Sometimes you forget, how much other people can actually mean to you. Or.. I do..